Wednesday, February 5, 2014

It's Very Middle Class..

I’ve recently had a few people acting like a fool and saying rude things to me. So, what else is there to do but call your momma and vent a little bit? My momma’s a good listener.. and then she will tell you her opinion on whatever it is. She let me vent, she told me what she thought, and I was good to go!

Then, the next day she sent me a text:
“Don’t be defeatist, dear. It’s very middle class.” (all said with an English accent)

You see, in my family, English/British accents are spoken quite regularly. Mainly because, everything sounds better in an English accent! Seriously, try it. But I loved the text, because a. my mom knows me too well and knows I’d still be thinking about it. And b. who wants to be in the middle class? No, no. My actions will definitely reflect the upper class.

With that being said, I’d like to present to you one-liner come backs that are best spoken with an English accent… because I took them from Downton Abbey… which is what my mom was watching when she sent me that text. But truly, I can think of many opportunities when I would use these in real life, with real people… and I can imagine the looks on their faces when I randomly start speaking with an accent.  

"I’d like to give her the old heave ho–in a dark alley somewhere."

"I'm a woman, Mary. I can be as contrary as I choose."

"Well, that's an easy caveat to accept, because I'm never wrong."

"When you talk like that, I'm tempted to ring for Nanny and have you put to bed with no supper."

“I wonder how your halo doesn’t grow heavy. It must be like wearing a tiara around the clock.”

And then I would say: “The business of life is the acquisition of memories. In the end that’s all there is.” So quit being a cotton headed ninny muggins!!!

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